So I give her $400 for groceries, next day she wants money. She was supposed to take some of the money up to her moms and use it for groceries this month so her mom wouldn't have to pay for everything. She spent $100 in one day here. She just took another $100 and she wants another $50. I bought airline tickets for $800, GPS/Camera (like $500). It never ends.
See I'm buying a house and It's like $3,100 a month vs. $2,000 a month for my current rent. When I met her I was at $1,200 a month. She doesn't have a job so it's up to me. :(
I'm going to have to pay like $800 to move, get a washer, dryer, fridge. I have to pay like $800 to get out of the apartment. I have $77/month college loan payment coming up, I have $3k on my credit card because of all these bullshit purchases, and I owe $1k on car insurance. She's getting us another loan to help stay alive that I have to pay back within a year.
I think the lesson is, don't let your chicks near the money, even if that means they're going to leave you! :) Let them whine and cry instead.
It's a horrible time for me to buy a house. I really need my tax money rebate and I won't get it before I have to pay like $12k in closing costs. I'm even going to have to borrow money just to keep going besides the loan on the house. It's a great time to buy houses just a horrible time financially for me. I should say no but this is the only time I can probably get a decent place where I got it.
She keeps saying that if you wait, you might never see interest rates like this. She might be right. We'll see.
I got rid of cable, netflix, gametap. That's like $150. I will eventually in a year get like 10k back in taxes for the house but that's a long time to survive until then. I'm thinking of borrowing some money from my 401k despite it being down $40k. But they're in the process of changing 401ks at work for the 3rd time. So I don't know how easy it will be to get a loan. I hear it takes a long time. + if you lose your job, they want the money back instantly.
The house is a real deal. With the interest rate at only 5%, a few months ago the same house would have been out of reach at +6%. So the only real issue is just keeping going this year until I can get bonuses and tax rebates. I do get to claim 1-3 more people on my taxes though (baby, kid, her).
Woah is me.
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dmikon
Peon
January 4th, 2009 @ 9:06PM
Registered:
2004-11-05
Location:
USA
Posts: 351
| You know what they say, if you want to protect your credit, stay single ;-)
Only thing I would say Nebu, is that you`re looking at the house purchase backwards. I think you should be financially ready to buy a house, and THEN look for a good time to buy, not the other way around. Plus, pretty much anywhere you read, the housing market is supposed to decline further in 2009.
In any case, hope it all works out for the better for you... |
Blazer
Instigator
January 4th, 2009 @ 9:29PM
Registered:
2003-09-04
Location:
Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1532
| Doesn't your girl read your website, and if so is this your way of confronting her about her exorbitant spending habits? |
DeuceOfSpades
Kali Compton
January 4th, 2009 @ 9:43PM
Registered:
2003-04-12
Location:
Posts: 2978
| Fucking decent mid-priced whores twice a week is a lot less expensive than a wife.
;)
The lesson is that if you like money, don't get married and don't have kids.
EDITED: 2009-01-04 21:43:32 |
hardcore puppy
Peon
January 4th, 2009 @ 11:33PM
Registered:
2003-11-02
Location:
Irvine, CA
Posts: 140
| It`s a horrible time for me to buy a house. I really need my tax money rebate and I won`t get it before I have to pay like $12k in closing costs. I`m even going to have to borrow money just to keep going besides the loan on the house. It`s a great time to buy houses just a horrible time financially for me. I should say no but this is the only time I can probably get a decent place where I got it.
If you get laid off, you`re where the rest of the country is in terms of foreclosure. |
Signum666
Grunt
January 5th, 2009 @ 2:10AM
Registered:
2003-10-27
Location:
Netherlands
Posts: 432
| Two words; Prenuptial Agreement. |
Nebuchadnezzar
Admin
January 5th, 2009 @ 2:28AM
Registered:
2003-03-20
Location:
Irvine, CA
Posts: 2882
| If you get laid off, you`re where the rest of the country is in terms of foreclosure.
Yeah someone in my e-family needs help and they can't get it until they're LATE on their payments. So they have to purposely be late in order to get any help.
Doesn't your girl read your website, and if so is this your way of confronting her about her exorbitant spending habits?
Sure!
EDITED: 2009-01-05 02:29:24 |
Apricoth
Kali Compton Girl
January 5th, 2009 @ 7:32AM
Registered:
2003-06-14
Location:
MN
Posts: 1739
| She needs to get that under control. She is an accountant, she should know better. My husband spends much more money than I do by far. I rarely buy anything for myself. I do get items for my little girl (I like to spoil her a little but even then I don't do a whole lot of it). Because we are pretty frugal with our money my husband was able to pay off my entire college school loans as a birthday gift for me ($19,000+). So there you have it. |
Wootah
non-leet
January 5th, 2009 @ 9:54AM
Registered:
2003-05-16
Location:
Utah
Posts: 1106
| That totally sucks.
I don't know how much she cooks or how much you guys spend on fast food, but that is killer to a budget. For the couple of years I lived in the amazon, I gained an appreciation for eating cheaply. Some people love to eat and that is the last thing on their list they want to sacrifice when the funds get tight, but during rough times you can survive on the essential food groups for next to nothing.
You might want to take up some of the shopping for food yourself or do it with her to see what she is dumping money on. |
forest_queen
Dame
January 5th, 2009 @ 11:04AM
Registered:
2003-03-26
Location:
WA
Posts: 1149
| Start a ledger and track all of your expenses. I'd start cutting out stuff that isn't necessary. I'm the cheapskate in my family, my husband doesn't get to carry his debit card or a credit card and his credit has never been better. So in our case, marriage was great for his credit ;) I know, I'm mean, but our credit stays in tact and we always have money for the things we need. He knows it too or he wouldn't let me control the finances. |
Nalcolm
Thinker
January 5th, 2009 @ 1:03PM
Registered:
2005-04-16
Location:
Posts: 561
| Start a ledger and track all of your expenses. I'd start cutting out stuff that isn't necessary.
This is the best advice ever when you're making money count. Know where all of it goes. Every bit.
Suddenly living on less money due to higher expenses is always unpleasant. Any chance of accounting work your girl could do from home? |
RowdyRoddyPiper
Nut Job
January 5th, 2009 @ 2:08PM
Registered:
2003-06-20
Location:
Nashville TN
Posts: 1015
| well here in tennesee we just grab our women throw em up against a wall, flip out our mullets and whoop the snot out of em. but i guess in cali-fornya your more civilized! hic |
BiVRiP
Grunt
January 5th, 2009 @ 4:17PM
Registered:
2003-05-11
Location:
Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1483
| That's excellent advice forest_queen. I bet a lot of people would be surprised to find out exactly where all their money goes.
I did the very thing you suggest when I was in the market for a new car. It blew my mind when I saw just how much money I was throwing away on just fast food / take out. Once I nailed down my essential expenses, I was able to save an extra $250 each month and knew within a few dollars how much disposable income I had to work with.
On a related note, I only have one credit card. I'd get rid of that too, except it's the only way I'll buy things online and it's good for building credit. I can't understand some people who have 3+ credit cards. It's more trouble than it's worth.
Another tip I've found useful is canceling all those annoying insurance and overdraft protection premiums that banks and credit card companies love to tack on. That, and I picked a checking account where I pay a one time monthly fee for unlimited transactions. All told, I saved myself about $20 a month. Not much, but that's enough gas money to get me through one week.
EDITED: 2009-01-05 16:18:59 |
GroverDill
Special Forces
January 5th, 2009 @ 5:19PM
Registered:
2003-04-09
Location:
your mom's house
Posts: 622
| Yeah, I can't really imagine trying to buy a house in Southern California on my salary alone, much less buying a house and also having to handle all of the expenses of supporting a family. Regardless of how much you make, that definitely seems like a stressful situation. |
DeuceOfSpades
Kali Compton
January 5th, 2009 @ 5:25PM
Registered:
2003-04-12
Location:
Posts: 2978
| I agree with Bivrip and Wootah: fast food is an absolute killer on your budget. But cooking as a single guy is a pain in the ass :( |
Deester
Peon
January 5th, 2009 @ 8:16PM
Registered:
2003-03-26
Location:
Indiana
Posts: 192
| beta.yodlee.com
or
www.mint.com
Use them. Prosper.
Yodlee is ugly but has more features.
Mint is prettier but more simple.
As for checking, schwab.com online checking is rated the best checking account in America.
2-3% interest on CHECKING
free checks
free deposit slips
use any ATM in the WORLD for FREE
no catches
As for savings accounts, there are many out there with high interest (and they vary all the time). Don`t go with anything lower than 3%. I use e-trade because its pretty badass. |
EugYev
Peon
January 5th, 2009 @ 8:29PM
Registered:
2005-08-25
Location:
brooklyn
Posts: 210
| Sounds busy. Good luck with the move and all. I can`t offer much advice as I`m still in school. But going in debt a bit when you get a house happens. My parents borrowed money from family to get the down payment on our house and then later they lent money to relatives when they were purchasing a place because of all the costs. It happens, but people pull through... good luck though. |
monkeygrrl18
Peon
January 5th, 2009 @ 9:05PM
Registered:
2004-02-27
Location:
Posts: 40
| If Hot Like Me already owns a house why aren`t you living there? |
Warp!
Grunt
January 5th, 2009 @ 9:23PM
Registered:
2003-04-06
Location:
Midwest
Posts: 49
| If you're still using Quicken to track your finances, now's a great time to take a look at your spending habits over the last year. We did yesterday, and it is very enlightening to see where the money is going. It's hard to believe how much we spend on food (restaurants) and groceries.
Good luck with the home purchase. HotLikeMe is right about the interest rates. I wouldn't expect them to get much lower. Sometime between now and June, I expect we'll hit the bottom.
Bottom line, just be sure you can meet your monthly commitments on your *current* income. Living on credit cards or short-term loans is very dangerous. It will catch up with you.
|
dethman18
Grunt
January 5th, 2009 @ 9:25PM
Registered:
2004-06-21
Location:
Georgia, USA
Posts: 68
| Sounds like my chick. When I met her she had 10k on a credit card and was getting nowhere by throwing $250 at it each month($230 interest each month!). I said you gotta throw every bit of that $4000+ income tax return at it or I'm out of here. She did and will have to do it again this year when she gets her income tax refund back. Then it's paid off. The 50k in school loans is another issue. :(
I have one credit card. I let almost all of my expenses go through it each month. That's thousands upon thousands of dollars in the five or so years I've had it. Guess how much interest I paid on that credit card. None. Not one cent. I pay it off every month and I know they hate me. But it keeps positive credit revolving and helps keep a credit score. |
Deester
Peon
January 6th, 2009 @ 12:11PM
Registered:
2003-03-26
Location:
Indiana
Posts: 192
| Good man dethman18. The key to building wealth is to become debt free. Also, your greatest wealth building tool is your income. Use it at its full potential by not paying anyone interest and having banks pay YOU interest!
I also use my credit card for all purchases and pay in full each month to rack up some cash back. However, I`ve heard that if you use a CC or debit card you spent on average 12% more than if you used cash. Also, some places give you discounts for using cash. But I like the convenience of a card and I have thifty discipline. :) |
BloodClot
Kali Compton
January 6th, 2009 @ 12:40PM
Registered:
2003-03-26
Location:
Southern OC
Posts: 407
| I have been married 16 1/2 years, with 2 kids. After the first kid (maybe 4 years into the marriage), and hearing my wife keep asking for money and wanting me to put things on store cards and credit cards, I told her that she should take the bills over. So she did, but I monitored what she was doing. Best thing I ever did. With your girl being an accountant, I don't know why you haven't done that yet.
Our discussions of "why can't I just go by xxxxx, it is only $10 a month more" went to "oh, we will be paying on that forever".
She does a really good job of it, and I don't have to do anything except check on her once in awhile. Since it is all in Quicken, and I know all the passwords for all our accounts, it is pretty easy to keep on top of things should I ever need to take over in an emergency.
As for her not working, and you not being married, but still combining all your finances. I would have issues with that, but that is your business, so I won't preach (oh wait, I just did, sorry).
|
Apricoth
Kali Compton Girl
January 6th, 2009 @ 6:06PM
Registered:
2003-06-14
Location:
MN
Posts: 1739
| Quicken for the win. Best ledger system ever and both of you can review where the money is going. Nice pie charts and everything. Hubby and I have been using that since day 1. You can even set-up bill pay through it and manage your credit card account as well - not just your checking account. |
starbabie
Peon
January 6th, 2009 @ 11:59PM
Registered:
2003-03-26
Location:
USA
Posts: 53
| Gezzz wake up. You are able to do these things because you have made the right choices. Now your in love have a child getting a little soft in the head.I see all this as a downfall in the making. |
